Chasing dreams? Or status quo?
One of my colleagues tried to preach me with his life experience today. He's a nice fellow, Greek, in his mid-50's (I assume), but has serious attitude.
I'm partly afraid of him, but also look up to him. He seldom speaks to me except asking me to do stuff. After doing him a favour, he will simply says thank you but no more than that.
Today, he caught me up in the common lounge. And he suddenly went, " I started my first business at 23. It was a cafe." To catch you up with some background context, we're working in a company that makes air conditioner filters. From cafe to owing a filter company, that's like Michael Jordan playing professional baseball, but worse.
I was stoked.
I couldn't repress my curiosity but ask, " how'd you make such a big change then?" "In the early 90's, I lost so much money, and I can't afford my family, you know, three kids in private school. I started doing service jobs and got dirty and stuff." he said. "That makes money mate!"
For a moment, I felt so insecure about the dream, the goal, and the noble vision, I've been chasing. His answer hit me, point-blank, and the bubble up above my head exploded.
In a few months time, I could be unemployed. I may keep my integrity, take the moral high ground and remain unemployed until I find something that I want to do.
Let's not forget that I'm living overseas, spending hell lots of my parents' money. Plus, a younger brother is after me, pending for his chance for his descent, costly tertiary education in 2 years time.
Alternative scenario. I could just get down to reality. Find a job that pays fine, or at least pays, and help ease my parents' financial burden.
I'm whining about it because I suddenly realise I've been so selfish the past two years.
I thought I was special because I don't fall into the typical Asian spectrum and do money-making subjects.
Only to find that two years later, now, I'm a complete selfish prick.
